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Mamajuana Brand total= 1 |
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Mamajuana Energy Mamajuana Energy Size: 2oz bottle Location Acquired: Vitamin Shoppe, Albany, NY Contributor: Cathy Knapp Location in Collection: The Roomies Taste Rating: -1/10 Energy Rating: 4/10 Review: My girlfriend called me from the Vitamin Shoppe and said "I found this little brown bottle; it looks cool. I'm getting it for you." I, realizing it was Mamajuana, was a little excited because I had seen it on the internet before but had never been able to find it. Fastforward to drinking it. The bottle says "Inspired by treasured Dominican elixir." What might that be...LIZARD DIARRHEA? Upon smelling this foul liquid, the nose is treated to a mix of rotting meat and permanent markers. I plugged my nose, and downed it. My face wrinkled up, stomach contorted, and my life flashed before my eyes. After swallowing, I ran for water, juice, anything to remove the taste from my mouth...nay, my soul. Then, everything faded to black (R.I.P. Michael Crichton). When I came to, however, I was nicely energized from the 200mg of caffeine hiding within this satanic brew of all that is evil. Mamajuana has not answered my inquiries as to whether their product is Hitler's blood; more info when it's available. |